Redesigning

30CBCE9D-ED92-4C1F-8DE3-BAA0A56AB5E9

When two people meet.
They lead you to your seat.
You order drinks.
You look over the menu.
Your thinking to yourself should you continue?
It’s been rough what you’ve been through.
You continue.
You order your meal.
And start thinking this isn’t such a big deal.
It’s nice.
Someone paying attention to you.
Complimenting you.
You continue.
He’s different.
You like that.
He’s smiling.
All the while your pining.
Over once was.
How’d you’d gotten here.
How far you’d come.
You wonder if he could actually make you cum.
It crosses your mind.
Because you’ve been doing it to yourself for quite sometime.
You miss a few words here and there.
And wonder if he ever cared.
You get scared.
Thinking what you thought was love wasn’t.
How could it have been?
Men!
You excuse yourself from the table and say “you’ll be right back.”
He says “I’m going to order another drink would you like something?”
“A refill on my water in a wine glass” you say.
Boy this has been a long day.
You go to the ladies room.
Thinking they could really use a broom.
You wash your hands and check your face.
And wonder how you even got to this place.
Checking your face.
You knew you couldn’t erase.
The past that’s been holding you back,
And that’s a fact!
You take a long look in the mirror and sigh,
And think of the man sitting at the table if his beard would feel good on your thigh.
Back to the bar you sit.
Again thinking is he the right fit?
You continue talking.
He orders yet another drink,
And start to think.
“You’ve been down this road before”
And remember the chore.
And know you cannot do that anymore.
Dinner arrives.
You eat your salad.
And listen to the ballad.
He’s new,
And the time blew,
Past you as he asked you
“How have I lived without you?”
You blush,
because you knew he had a crush.
You smile and your cheeks flush.
Oh what a rush!
It’s been too long.
Something was bound to go wrong.
It did.
You noticed.
He seemed off focus.
You don’t drink.
You knew it caused you to think.
Unclearly or not at all.
And wonder if a fairy tale was even real after all.
He asks for the check.
And still you reflect,
On how you 1st met.
Was it serendipitous as you once had thought?
Or is it that you just got caught?
In the idea of,
Him being sent from up above.
You question.
And wonder.
And pray there won’t be any thunder.
He walks you to the car and you insist on driving.
His alcohol level was rising.
You protect yourself.
Better than you did.
For so long you had hid.
The beer bottles piled by the sink in the morning,
So he could count while you were pining.
Over him and what could have been.
If he only knew how much he ment to you,
Maybe then you would have made it through.
He closes the door.
Not able to explore.
Your very being.
For with him there will be no more.
Because now you know on a scale from one to ten
You will never put yourself through that again.

#PauseReflectMoveForward

Holly DressON NOT Holly DressOFF

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

w

Connecting to %s